At the time, The Real Housewives of Orange County was just what I needed. I was so sleep deprived it was probably the only show I could follow. And when you are covered in baby spew, surrounded by mess and too exhausted to care, taking a waltz in the ridiculous world of over-wealth and bitchiness can be so oddly refreshing. It was hilarious. These women with all this money! They're so silly. And they actually think they're people! I'd laugh. I'd watch as they complained about how tough it was to be a stay at home mom of three children with two nannies. Ha! I thought! Try doing it with zero nannies!
I just found it so funny how big a contrast there was between my life and theirs. I mean sure there are obvious differences. They wear make-up, to go to the GYM! I sometimes don't even wear make-up to go out for dinner! But it was the deeper differences I found even more interesting. For one, they are incredibly vain. They spend more time focusing on their appearance than any other part of themselves, even the mothers and God lovers among them. They are also not just ridiculously rich, but they want people to think they are so. How much money they actually have is anyone's guess. To watch them spend so much money on things like nails, spray tans, lunching, and champagne is just beyond me. Even if I had the money I don't think I would live like that everyday. I have to say watching the show in the height of the recession did make me chuckle a little. To see them start off being so superfluous with money, only to see them losing their ridiculously ostentatious mansions was just priceless. Especially because they are all so mean to each other. Come on girls, whatever happened to sisterhood?
Yep, they are so truly bitchy it is nauseating. But who's to know if that is really them or just part of the act. I'm not exactly sure on how the show works, but I'd say there must be a little bit of a competition for air time. I mean if the crew turns up and you're just sitting in your jammies eating toast, it doesn't make for great T.V does it? And I mean how do they get paid? Do they get paid per episode appearance? If so it kinda makes sense that they cause crap and backstab to stay in the game doesn't it? Also, pretty much all of the girls in these shows have spin-off investments that rely on their star power from the show. Gretchin Rossi has a hand-bag line, Alexis Billinio has a dress line, both of which came about because they were made famous from TRHOC. So in a way being a bitch is a way to make more money. Oh dear.
The thing that really bothers me about 'The Real Housewives' is that is a total oxymoron. Kind of like 'Fun Run' or 'Hospital Food.' Real Housewives of anywhere do not have cameras filming their every move. Therefore, they do not pile on make up to clean their house and what's more they actually clean their own houses. (mostly). They do not host parties purposely intended to cause a fight for the camera. Real women let things go. If they fight they let it fizzle out. They don't try to fight every last disagreement to the death. What's the point? No one is watching so it's not gonna make you any money. It just hurts people.
Newcomer Heather Dubrow, who claims to be an actress but who is actually just a trophy wife is a nasty, self-righteous piece of work. She has a huge stick up her ass and seems to think she is the authority on all things well-to-do. She's not. She is just a pretentious bitch.
Vicki is still around, woohoo-ing her way through but actually being nice for once. Alexis is still there too, though you'd wonder why because most of the other girls are ganging up on her and being utterly cruel. Apparently the girls decided to take it upon themselves to tell Alexis she was 'fake' and 'phoney', (which is a little hilarious coming from them! They are all just as fake, phoney and pretentious as each other!) And understandably this group attack makes Alexis very upset. This fact actually seems to aggravate the bullies even more. The become outraged that Alexis finds the group character bashing offensive.
The worst part about it all is that I can't even really hate them, because I don't even think they are being themselves at all. I think the women they portray on the screen are not the women they really are. They are all out to desperately become famous in some way, no matter what it takes. Even if it means portraying an awful hateful person for all to see on T.V. All for what? To sell a clothing line? or handbags? For what? So you can buy more crap you don't really need? Can we really blame them though? Society is rather obsessed with fame, and has been for as long as it has been possible to extend yourself through digital media. As Warhol predicted "In the future, everyone will be world famous for 15 minutes". Though this is definitely true for these women, it seems as though they are viciously clawing those minutes from each other like a pack feral cats.
The interesting part of these shows is the careful crafty editing. Designed in such a way as to make things look even more bitchy than they are. Cut, snip, cut. Bitchy look. Snide remark. Repeat as needed. Clever. I actually feel a bit sorry for these women. They are mere puppets.
There is nothing real about the real housewives at all. From their tans, to their hair colour and all that comes out of their lipstick lined mouths. It is all a farce. What is even more aggravating is that I keep watching this show! It seems to be like pushing a bruise. It is painful but I can't stop doing it. Lately though it has been making me feel quite sick to watch it. These are not the kind of women I want in my life. I don't want to know them and I don't want to hang out with them. They are nasty and I can no longer stand it. I do not want that energy seeping out of the T.V and into my soul. So it is over. I will stop letting them into my house, my heart and my life. No more will they fill my T.V screen. We are done. Goodbye ladies. Good luck, and for goodness sake be nice to each other! And bloody hell, read a book or something!