It's just sitting there, luring me in with its bullshit. "Coome oon," it calls to me. "Switch me ooon, you knoow you waannaa!" So I do. And I hate myself for it.
There are so so so many things I could be doing instead of watching T.V. I have at least five novels in my head that could be getting written. I have countless paintings plotted out in my head, a book on the lives of artists that is in its early stages (of consideration, in my brain) and one children's book, which I would quite like to write and illustrate myself. There is also a guitar that is not played nearly enough. I just replaced the high E string again after it was broken by one of my boys (as yet, neither has owned up, which could mean my almost 2 year old Donovan is responsible, as he is yet to start talking coherently). I also have a huge lump of clay in my 'mum cupboard' which I have every intention of moulding masks with. Except. I keep watching shit on t.v. Real shitty shit. Stuff I don't even want to watch. Stupid shows about idiotic stock characters. The goody the baddy, the hot chick, the funny fat chick. It pisses me right off.
Don't get me wrong. Some shows are good. Some are funny. And some are very clever and well done. I watched devotedly as Dexter did the world a favour and removed bad people from the streets. I tune in for vampire sex with Sookie, Bill and Eric. I even watch while Carrie Mathison falls for a terrorist (Well is he or isn't he? I don't even know anymore) in Homeland. But lately things have gotten a little lack lustre. I've been learning about the not-so-real history of Sleepy Hollow, studying the Masters of Sex, even dabbling in some made for TV marvel action with The Agents of SHIELD. All of it leaves me empty.
I suspect the reason for this emptiness is that my T.V watching has gotten a tad out of hand. It used to be a treat. True blood was only on one night a week. That one night was a big deal. Lover-Man and I would be super excited for that one night of quality viewing. We'd prepare a good cup of P.G tips and settle in for some good relaxing viewing. It was exciting. Why? Cus every other night was a 'work night'. These days though, work nights have become less and less, and more often than not, we are sitting down to watch some less than riveting telly. Deep down I know that I should get up, turn the rubbish off and do something productive, but I can't. The T.V has me trapped. Paralysed like a hypnotised zombie. I am but a victim, forced against my will(power) to sit aimlessly and watch Border Patrol, or even worse Mitre 10 Dream Home or (gasp) The Block. All of it trash. All of it senseless drivel, made only to sell DIY building products to people, who will only learn once it is too late, that it never, ever pays to DIY!
In a last ditch effort to improve the quality of our screen time, we attempted to watch movies instead. The problem with movies is that they are long. You have to commit to the whole film to really judge if it is good or bad. What's worse is that if you get to the end and discover it was a bad film, then you kinda feel like your whole evening was wasted. If it's a good film though, you feel fulfilled and richer for the experience. But it is really a lucky dip. We have now watched all of the films that are available in the new release section on Moviefone. After a while I started to feel odd. Empty again. Like a jelly doughnut without the jelly. A person void of essence. The films were sucking the life out of me; with their flawless imitations of life, condensed down to young girls with skinny backsides. Cus when you think about it, when you really break it down, that's all most mainstream films are. A young skinny backside, dressed up to sing a different song, dance a different dance.
What is my new years resolution then? Yes that's right. I vow, with you all as my witnesses, that for the month of January, I will not watch any T.V shows or movies whatsoever!* Instead I will write; to you, my fine people, every night. It's a win-win. You all get to read more of my crazed ramblings and I get to refill the cavity in my soul that evil, heartless television has created.
I'm sure I will complain at you all about the lack of screen time. I will bitch and I will moan and yes, I may blame you all for making me do this. But please, do not play in to my cries for attention. Like with all interventions we must remain strong. Don't let me give in.